Why Women Want to Get Married

Let me start this post out by saying that the following content is not applicable to 100% of women. I know very well that there is a large population of women who have no interest in marriage and that there is also a large population of women who get married for reasons completely different than the ones I provide. I get it, I got it, move on.

To most men, weddings seem like an extraordinary waste of time and money and they're just a big party celebrating a piece of paper. What's the point of getting married when you don't need a piece of paper to love someone forever? It's just a tax break, really and if your relationship is all about love who the hell needs an expensive, seemingly useless celebration.

Women see it a *tiny* bit differently. Let's break it down:

1. It's just a piece of paper and a tax break, yes. But it's a piece of paper signed by you saying that you're publicly okay with admitting that you want to love and cherish her for the rest of her life. In every relationship there is a question of doubt, and one of the biggest questions is "Are we meant to be?" and one of the best ways to settle that, at least for a while, is to be with a guy who wants to marry you. Marriage means forever, which helps to eliminate the question of whether you are willing to be the last guy who she's ever with (at least in theory, people tend not to go into a marriage knowing that they're going to get a divorce). Basically, you are willing to publicly declare that you want to be with her for the rest of your life which is a hell of a lot more reassuring than "we've been dating for a long time already, why wouldn't we be together for even longer?"

2. It's outrageously expensive and it doesn't make sense to spend that much money on a party, right? You know James Bond and his awesome tuxedo? Remember how he gets out of his beautiful car and walks in and orders a martini, shaken not stirred, and then seduces a beautiful woman? Isn't this like the epitome of manliness? If that doesn't work for you, think of something else equally manly. Now, if you had a chance to be like James Bond, in your tuxedo, with the car, the martini and the babe, wouldn't you go for it? One of the most idolized moments for women is the white dress, the aisle, the cake, etc. It is our epitome of womanhood. It is our special day, the happiest day of our life, and most importantly, the day that satisfies every need of our self centeredness. It's our day and we will make sure it's exactly how we want it to be, and it's our wedding so we can get away with it. Women start planning their wedding from the first moment they put a pillow case over their head and pretend to walk down a fairy princess aisle. And the planning definitely changes over the years, I personally have gone from wanting to get married in a castle (age 6) to the geekier wedding of getting married on the bridge of the enterprise (age 19) to whatever other ideas sound good at the time. We really can't help it, it was ingrained in us by society, the only thing you can do is to teach your daughters to value themselves in a relationship more than a piece of paper does.

3. You might believe that the divorce rate is high/marriages don't have a shot/the union of marriage is a joke/my parents didn't work out so I don't even want to bother with it.

Chances are that if she wants to marry you, she believes that you will be together forever. If you don't have a shot at believing the same thing, you might want to break up with her and give her the chance of finding someone who can believe that. Don't waste her time with your baggage.

4. Wondering why women still bother with the sexist tradition of being given like property to a man that is a wedding? Because some women actually want to be taken care of. They want to be a housewife and a mother and they kind of need a husband and provider for that. If you have a girlfriend like this, she will probably never change these desires, so either step up or get out.

Some women just want a man to claim them as theirs. A woman with a husband has a sort of claim over this guy, kind of a "He picked me. He chose me. He loves me. Back off." It's also an indication to other women that they are desirable enough to catch a mate.

Or maybe she just wants a commitment from you that you aren't going anywhere and you'll share your life together, as idealistic as that sounds.

I'm not even going to go into religious or arranged marriages, those are just a whole new ballgame. I will say that if you are with a girl who is waiting for marriage, don't marry her just to have sex. If you aren't personally waiting or don't want to wait, don't date her and just let her find someone who is okay and supportive with her beliefs.

If you absolutely do not want to get married, I'd recommend making that clear right up front in a new relationship and seeking out women with the same feelings. It's hard to give up a dream most women have for decades and decades, and certainly easier to find someone who doesn't have the dream at all.

Good luck!